Coping with the busyness and pressures.

I am sure many of us have felt overwhelmed at some point in our lives. It is a frustrating and horrible feeling which can stop us seeing clearly and thinking strategically. It could be related to a relationship, a loss, being too busy, pressures at work, or you may have too many deadlines. Sometimes life can throw a lot at us, and we have to work hard to not let the negative emotions grow and take over. Whatever has caused it, being overwhelmed can feel all-encompassing and impact other areas of our lives, therefore it is important to recognise the feelings leading up to that to stop it taking over.

What do we mean when we say we are ‘overwhelmed?’

Being overwhelmed generally means we are feeling stressed, overworked, too busy, worried or anxious and there is a fear that you will not be able to cope or do everything you have been asked to or feel you should be doing. You feel you have to do things right now; you feel you need to solve everything, right now. Once you are overwhelmed you can start to feel like you are drowning, but you are not drowning, you are just, at that time, feeling pressured and everything has merged into one.

What can I do when I feel overwhelmed?

Stop! Break it all down! Prioritise! One of the key causes of feeling overwhelmed is that you feel you have to sort everything out right now, you put unrealistic expectations on yourself, and this stops you seeing things rationally, therefore stress creeps in and viola you feel overwhelmed. So often, once we get to the point of being overwhelmed, we actually stop being proactive, our thoughts are too muddled and we don’t know where to start.

Therefore, take a deep breath, realise you are not drowning and tell yourself that everything will be ok. You will be ok! I am firm believer of writing all the things swirling around in your mind down. It allows you to stop them merging and growing into a large ball of stress allowing you to prioritise. This helps you realise, that quite often, there is not as much needing your attention at this very moment, you able to rationally and methodically work out what needs your attention right now, making your steps more manageable.

How are you talking to yourself? By repeating you feel overwhelmed you are reinforcing this negative emotion and giving it more power over you. Indeed, acknowledge you are feeling pressured. Recognise you are feeling stressed, but do not give any emotion the power to allow you feel like you are sinking. You need to talk yourself down from the negative feelings, not feed them.

Tell yourself

· ‘I am doing the best I can.’

· ‘I am going to prioritise and begin at a manageable pace.’

· ‘I am managing and will be ok.’

· ‘I can ask for help if I need it.’

· ‘I will do this all, one step at a time.’

Remember, just because there is a lot to do, you do NOT have to feel overwhelmed. Have the belief in yourself that you will be just fine.

Time Out

We all need to take time out from the busyness of our lives. The way we do this can differ for us all. Below are some strategies to help you slow down and reflect.

· Mediate ~ this can help declutter your mind, slow down your breathing and allow you think slower and rationally.

· A walk ~ fresh air can do wonders for the mind. Take some deep breaths and either let your brain naturally start to untangle itself or listen to a podcast or some positive music. Whatever works for you.

· Mindfulness ~ This is the practise of living in the moment, in the hear and now. By making yourself live in the present, when you are feeling overwhelmed, you can ask yourself, ‘am I living in the future?’ if so, bring yourself back to the present, acknowledge the feeling of panic, then mindfully process what is causing that and put in a plan to resolve it.

Good is Good Enough

I remember being told this many years ago, and to this day I still remind myself of this. None of us can be outstanding in absolutely everything. That isn’t only unstainable but also not realistic. GOOD IS GOOD!

Validate your Feelings

For everything we experience in life, our feelings are unique to us. Yes, we will have similar reactions, we all know what it is to feel sad or happy etc, however the extent in which we feel emotions, the extent in which emotions affect our lives are personal to each of us. No one will feel things the way you feel them.

And finally, be patient and kind with yourself. Trust that, like with all feelings, this too shall pass. Don’t beat yourself up for feeling any emotion, just ensure you acknowledge it and take the power back.